An Open Letter to Pia from Clickbait

Dear Pia, I am writing this letter to you because I care for you and your well-being. No, I’m lying. It’s because I’m petty. I am writing this letter to you because I’m petty. Pia Brewer, you are the most annoying character Netflix has ever created. In fact, you are the most annoying character in the history of picture shows. When I try to contemplate someone or something more annoying than you, my brain breaks. My brain literally stops working and starts bleeding, thus resulting in a slight aneurysm. Pia,…

Dinner with Jay-Z or 500K? I chose the Dinner, and this is what happened

Jay-Z: You chose dinner with me over 500k? Me: Yep! Jay-Z: Why? Me: Don’t mean why not? Jay-Z: No, I mean why. Me: I mean, don’t you have the keys to life or some shit? I’m trying to get this paper! Jay-Z: But “getting to the paper” would’ve been choosing the 500k. Me: Huh? Jay-Z: Never mind. What you mean by the keys to life? Me: Yeah, you know, like, MAJOR keys! Jay-Z: N*gga, you think we in a rap video? Me: I mean, why not. I got bars. Jay-Z:…

Elijah McClain was a Black Nerd, like a lot of us; And they killed him anyway

I assiduously wear the Blerd moniker as a badge of honor. That label, that honor means so much to me, that I have the words “Black Nerd” tattooed in the inner part of my upper right arm. It defines me. It defines a lot of us. Blerds are different. That’s why we exist. It’s not just for the love of comic books, or Star Wars, or anime, or Lovecraft Country or astrophysics. Nah, it just means we embraced our uniqueness. That we’re proud to be…different. Not better; Not smarter; Just…different.…

An Interview With the Top Crate

There has been an awakening, have you felt it? Coming off America’s inspiring performances during this year’s Summer Olympic games, a new Olympic game emerged. Something far more difficult, reckless, back breaking and death defying than any Olympic game played in Tokyo. In communities across the United States, the non regulated Olympic game known as the Milk Crate Challenge has taken social media, our curiosity and our backs by storm. In this challenge, we have seen many failures sprinkled with surprising success, including Olympic Gold Medalist, White Mike, who managed…

Andrew Cuomo Was About To Buy Disney+

In a shocking development, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo will resign over allegations of sexual harassment. Cuomo, who was said to be flabbergasted by the accusations, feels like there is a conspiracy to get rid of him and his political power, which was trending upward over his handling of the COVID 19 pandemic. Rumors have been circulating for sometime that Cuomo was on the verge of purchasing Disney+. That’s right, Cuomo was going to purchase Iron Man, Thanos, Mickey, Minnie and Luke Skywalker from “the man.” The details of Cuomo’s…