December 4, 2023

Don Imus is dead. *Yawn*

Yes, the same Don Imus who looked like a dead white woman going through the first stages of rigor mortis and who once famously referred to black women as “nappy-headed hoes” has died, tonight at the age of 79.

I know, I know, not gone soon enough.

*Was “nappy-headed hoes” gate a one time thing or no?*

Of course not. See, this wasn’t the first and only time Don Imus allowed his racism to shine. Imus, may he rest in Black Hell aka Ronald Reagan Heaven, was a practicing racist for a long time. He once called African-American Bill Roden, The New York Times sports columnist, a “quota hire.” He also referred to the immaculate and news media giant, Gwen Ifill, as a “cleaning lady.”

The practicing racist (who some argued perfected the art) would also casually attack Jewish people, Arabs and a variety of other nationalities and ethnic groups in order to meet his racist quota.

The news of Imus’ death will undoubtedly leave racists across the country and around the world mourning the loss of one of their brothers at arms. He will be missed by those who view the white race as having perfected life and seasoning and the only thing standing in their way are the non-whites of the world.

And with the passing of this racist giant, I just have one simple question. What y’all drinking on, tonight?

See me, I was leaning toward brown since it’s almost my birthday. However, drinking on brown is hit or miss. Either “Brown never lets me down” or “Brown makes me frown.” I just don’t know which brown I’m going to get, so I think I will just stick with white liquor, tonight. Maybe hit up the liquor “stoe” and cop me some Tito’s. Speaking of Tito’s, what the fuck?!? It used to be that bottom of the shelf quality liquor no one knew about. Now it’s mid shelf and steady climbing.

I HATE that everyone is on the Tito’s bandwagon, now. I wish y’all would go back to Ciroc or Absolute or Taaka Vodka already and leave us “bougie niggas on a budget” Tito’s drinkers alone.

In closing, Fuck Don Imus (who literally looked like death before he met death) and, most importantly, leave my Tito’s alone before it moves up to the top shelf. 

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