Ted Cruz has been a bad senator. Now we know that he’s a bad dad.

ted cruz cancun airport photos
Cruz: “With school cancelled for the week, our girls asked to take a trip with friends. Wanting to be a good dad, I flew down with them [Wednesday] night and am flying back this afternoon.” Photo: @Juan_Gomez18/Twitter

In this week’s rendition of Nero fiddling as Rome burns, on Thursday ReTrumplican Senator Ted Cruz was caught red-handed (ba-dum-tssst) fleeing his home in the newly arctic tundra of Texas; favoring instead to fly over the border wall he and his Cancerous Czar worked so hard to build, and baptize himself in the warm waters of Cancún: a city in the very country whose citizens he don’t give af about.

But this kind of elitist hypocrisy was entirely expected—it’s actually refreshingly surprising that more ReTrumplicans haven’t been caught doing something similar. 

It’s not enough that this lovechild of Count Von Count and a glob of wax lacked the courage to defend his wife against the attacks of his then-opponent, only to use the scant amount of testicular fortitude available to befriend said opponent and perpetuate #TheBigLie. Alas, upon returning stateside posthaste due to the well-deserved backlash from both political parties and they mama, Ted Cruz blamed his daughters for abandoning Texans as the state freezes to death. 

“With school cancelled for the week, our girls asked to take a trip with friends. Wanting to be a good dad, I flew down with them [Wednesday] night and am flying back this afternoon,” said Cruz in a statement on Thursday. But come Thursday evening, The New York Times got some receipts, which clearly indicate that those babies had nothing to do with their parents’ callous stupidity. Mrs. Cruz reportedly sent a group text to her upset (and cold) homegirls, inviting them to the Ritz-Carlton in Cancún, Mexico from Wednesday until Sunday, because her house was “FREEZING.”

Ted Cruz’s Family Tree

Of all the WTF moments Cruz’s caucasity is responsible for, his excuse of “[w]anting to be a good dad” was particularly WTF-y. Good dads teach their kids how to be elitist and oblivious to tact? How is shirking his responsibilities as a Senator of a state in dire need of basic relief an example of being a good dad? Since when do good dads teach their children how to flaunt their wealth—derived from tax dollars—to escape the consequences of natural disasters? Good dads throw good moms under the bus in an effort to get in and stay in the dad’s ENEMY’s good graces? Daughters of good dads are now eligible to be sacrificial lambs for a good dad’s BAD conduct?


Ted Cruz made clear that he was a bad senator years ago, but now he’s revealed that he’s also a bad dad. This week has seen tweet after tweet from good Texan parents doing everything they can to protect their children from a deadly winter snap that is beyond anyone’s control. If Cruz was a private citizen, smuggling him and his family from peril to paradise would be expected—maybe even applauded. 

But #FlyingTed is an elected official who swore an oath to protect his constituents; therefore, fleeing from a state of emergency that he is supposed to help remedy is a blatant act of cowardice. 

And Cruz blaming his cowardice on his daughters is straight simp behavior. 

Fathers are supposed to protect their daughters, not use them as props for political gain (or losses). Sadly, when it comes to standards of conduct Cruz has for himself, the bar is in Satan’s sphincter—especially when it comes to his family.

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